Praha Love

Sooo good to be back, and in many ways feels like I never left. Staying with two of my favorite people ever, and have already shared a ton of laughs. It's going to be a great week...

When the going gets tough...

So, I came across this as I was going through my blogroll the other day.  It's from the Desiring God blog.  (You should check it out)  Really hit home for me, and wanted to share it.  Pray it's encouraging and leads you to the harder, sweeter path.

Did you wake up not feeling like reading your Bible and praying? How many times today have you had to battle not feeling like doing things you know would be good for you?
While it’s true that this is our indwelling sin that we must repent of and fight against, there’s more going on.
Think about this strange pattern that occurs over and over in just about every area of life:

• Good food requires discipline to prepare and eat while junk food tends to be the most tasty, addictive, and convenient.
• Keeping the body healthy and strong requires frequent deliberate discomfort while it only takes constant comfort to go to pot.
• You have to make yourself pick up that nourishing theological book while watching a movie can feel so inviting.
• You frequently have to force yourself to get to devotions and prayer while sleeping, reading the sports, and checking Facebook seems effortless.
• To play beautiful music requires thousands of hours of tedious practice.
• To excel in sports requires monotonous drills ad nauseum.
• It takes years and years of schooling just to make certain opportunities possible.
• This goes on and on.

The pattern is this: the greater joys are obtained through struggle and pain, while brief, unsatisfying, and often destructive joys are right at our fingertips. Why is this?
Because, in great mercy, God is showing us everywhere, in things that are just shadows of heavenly things, that there is a great reward for those who struggle through (Hebrews 10:32-35). He is reminding us repeatedly each day to walk by faith and not by sight (2 Corinthians 5:7).
Each struggle is an invitation by God to follow in the footsteps of his Son, “who for the joy that was set before him endured the cross, despising the shame, and is seated at the right hand of the throne of God” (Hebrews 12:2).
Those who are spiritually blind only see futility in these things. But for those who have eyes to see, God has woven hope (faith in future grace) right into the futility of creation (Romans 8:20-21). Each struggle is a pointer saying, “Look! Look to the real Joy set before you!”
So when you don’t feel like doing what you know is best for you, take heart and don’t give in. Your Father is pointing you to the reward he has planned for all who endure to the end (Matthew 24:13).

For this light momentary affliction is preparing for us an eternal weight of glory beyond all comparison, as we look not to the things that are seen but to the things that are unseen. For the things that are seen are transient, but the things that are unseen are eternal. (2 Corinthians 4:17-18)

Honesty

Many of you know I’m, typically, one of the most open, real people you’ll meet.  I absolutely love honesty…just being up front and real with any and everything.  I think it’s essential in most all relationships.  I love the same quality in authors I read.  Donald Miller is one of those authors.  I know many of you have read Blue Like Jazz.  Some people love Miller, and some not so much. Either way, I find him incredibly real and raw in this book. He talks about things and admits things I think many of us are afraid to admit.  Vulnerability is such a button for emotions.  It can make you feel as free as a bird and as uncomfortable as sitting next to a live snake all at the same time.  I love it. 

In this book, Miller talks about vulnerability in a horizontal and vertical direction.  Vertical in the sense we are built to connect with people.  Not just physically, but emotionally and spiritually.  This requires we take down walls, and allow ourselves to be naked and bare to others.  This can be a really frightening thing, especially if we have experiences in our past that have ended with rejection and/or hurt. At the same time, we have an even deeper need to connect with the one true God of this world.  This is the horizontal aspect.  Here’s where authenticity is vital, and often times most difficult.  For those who have been around the church scene for any significant amount of time, you have probably been surrounded by many of these people, many “white-washed tombs.”  In fact, I could have been one of them at some point.  They look great on the outside, but dead and empty on the inside.  Too afraid to question or have doubts.  The thing is, God already knows we are having those doubts.  He’s just waiting for us to be real with Him, and lay it all out there.  He loves when we do this.  It’s as if He’s saying, “Finally, something I can work with. Finally what you’re really thinking.”  The most freeing times in my walk are the times I’m having an completely real and open talk with God.  Baring it all: anger, sadness, disappointment, the list goes on. So, I ask you and myself...how honest have you been with your Maker lately?  Trust that He is bigger then all our doubts, fears, anger, sadness, and any other emotion you can think of...

U2

Simply amazing...

If You Stole My IPod...

You would hear...

"Shovel"  Katie Herzig 

"The Adventure"  Anglels & Airwaves

"Begin Again"  Colbie Cailat

"Save You"  Matthew Perryman Jones

"Please Don't Stop The Rain"  James Morrison 

"Chicken Fried"  Zac Brown Band 

"No You Girls"  Franz Ferdinand 

"New York to California"  Mat Kearny

"Answer"  Sarah McLachan

"Never Say Never" The Fray

God is...

God is real.  God is working.  God is alive and well. 

I'm Feeling...

Sore from 2 long runs...

Annoyed that I broke my dinner plates while moving.

Excited I FINALLY got to take a shower.

Looking forward to it being Sunday tomorrow.

Loving my new bed...loving even more the fact I'm in it right now.

Super pumped I'll be in Prague in two months.

Blessed by God's provision.

Grateful for His Love.

Curious as to what the future holds...

A bit scared to see what happens with Michigan this year...so far so good!

Less and less shocked by the twist and turns of college football season...oh how I love college football!

An aching in my heart to spend some much needed quality time with my bff and those Kashuba kids!

Ready for volleyball season to be over.

Motivated...to do what? Not exactly sure yet.

Incredibly grateful for the silence.

Ready to take some steps forward.

And ready for bed! Goodnight everyone!

VFND

That wonderful event we all look forward to, aka 10 year high school reunion, took place last weekend for me.  Are there even words to describe an event like that?  Really odd, awkward, but fun all at the same time. 

Back in Januaryish myself and 2 other Lamar graduates sat down to start planning what our 10 year reunion would look like.  After some brainstorming we settled on a venue, planned the weekends events, established a budget, and took off.  Let me just tell you, finding over 600 graduates 10 years later is not an easy task!

There were some ups and downs along the way, but all in all, I think it went really well.  Below are just a few pics from the night.  The first being Christine, Aimee, and I...the two I had the pleasure of working with.  Thanks to all who came! It was definitely each of you that made it a fun weekend!

Good for my soul...

Music is such a staple to life for me.  LOVE it...Here's what I'm rockin lately.  Enjoy. Feedback more than welcome...Definitely check them out!

Mat Kearney:  City of Black and White -  The whole album is PHENOMENAL. Seriously.

Needtobreathe: "Let Us Love" and "Lay Em Down"

Future of Forestry:  "If You Find Her"

Taylor Swift:  "Breathe" with Colbie Caillat
                       "The Best Day"

Colbie Caillat:  Her new album is really quite good. My top 3 picks are "I Never Told You," "Fallin For You," and "You Got Me"

The Script:  They've been on my radar for awhile.  They have some good stuff.  The latest jam is "I'm Yours"

Michael Franti & Spearhead: Say Hey (I Love You) - VERY fun jam

Breathe

LOVE this...

Some Likes and the "Not So Much" List

So, I was going through old papers, and found a bunch of my old vball stuff; workouts, inspirational articles, goals, etc. One of the things my coach in college had us do at the beginning of season was write down 100 things we liked and 100 things we didn't like. Everyone on the team would then get a copy of each persons' list, and we would, to some degree, get to know each teammate. Just a fun, random way to bring in freshmen more or less.

Anyways, I was reading over my list, and thought it very interesting and a bit humorous some of the things I wrote down. I found myself wondering where in the world I got some of that stuff. I decided to share a few with y'all...

Things I Liked:
1. raisins
2. flamingos (yeah, no clue on this one)
3. no lines at Wal-Mart (um, cause who doesn't love no lines at wal-mart?)
4. Mach 3 razors (they had significant impact in my world)
5. and apparently rap music (cause it made the list twice)
6. N*Sync
7. 90210

The Not So Much:
1. girls softball (more funny to me cause I'm surrounded by softball people now)
2. Vince Gill (hi-larious I actually put this)
3. sauerkraut (naaasty stuff)
4. tea (and now I love tea)
5. being "petted" (apparently this was an issue for me?)
6. stinky dead fish
7. leather seats

Lost Sight

It's sad to me to think how much I've been focusing inward, and completely lost sight of anything around me. I feel as though I've gone from one extreme to the other this past year of life. It's strange to me how fast things change. Well, I guess this wasn't necessarily a "fast" change for me. (Unless you consider a year fast?) But no matter how much you know or feel yourself changing, I'm not sure you're really able to see the change until it's pretty far gone...or maybe I'm not being completely honest in that. I think I might have known the change was occuring, but just didn't do anything about it. Either way, my ability at self-awareness in no way helped deter or slow my progression to my current state.

I am such a different person than I was a year ago. Not that the goal is to stay the same, but the change I've seen is not the kinda change I want. I realize this post will probably come off completely ambiguous to all but those 2 or 3 people that actually have walked beside me this past year, so forgive me for that. I'm sure details will come out down the road. To be honest, I'm not sure I could really articulate what's been going on anyways.

The point of this random entry is for me to acknowledge there needs to be a shift within, and I think publicly admitting that sometimes helps in that process...accountability to some degree.

I pray for the strength and grace to go walk towards Him. Allowing Him to redeem, soften, and love me...all of me.

"Now seek the Lord your God with all your heart..." 1 Chron 22:19

Does God Give a Rip...

about balance?

Last fall I started reading Contrarians Guide to Knowing God. Unfortunately, I put it down last fall, and forgot to pick it back up. Finally opened it up again, and decided to share some points that encouraged/challenged me.

Towards the end of the book Osborne presents a chapter on balanced living. Since my life seems on all fronts painfully out of balance, I figured I was in for it. Very quickly into the chapter I was reading points and thoughts very counter to what I expected to be reading (hints the title I suppose).

He begins by presenting examples of obvious imbalance in lives from key people in the Bible. Noah, Moses, Jeremiah, David, and even Paul all had areas of their life that could be challenged as being "out of balance." He says this notion is really more a reflection of American culture than Biblical example.

Of course, he's not saying this should be taken into extreme. Certainly we want to prevent imbalance in areas that can cause harm to ourselves or others. But let's be honest, results like that do not happen over night but over time. And this is the key (at least the key that I took from the chapter). When we're faced with competing priorities in life, my goal should not be complete balance, but focus on what God is calling me to in that moment on that day. The different callings God has for each of us call for a certain amount of sacrifice in other areas. The missionary overseas does not get the time with family others do. The mother of three may not have the time to do small groups and pour into someone one-on-one as someone else. Each calling typically comes with a bit of limitation.

He provides three questions we can ask ourselves when trying to assess where we're at in the spectrum of "balance."

1) What season is this?
"Life is not static." Examples he gave: the farmer during harvest, the mother of 3 children under 6, the person starting up a business. All three are examples of seasons that may come with serious "imbalance." As much as it is very much what God has called them to, it is temporary.

2) What does God want me to do today?
Each day comes with a specific call from God. For the college student who has to pass his/her finals, it might mean a few days of serious study. This may mean they can't make small group that week, family might be a bit neglected, but I believe God wants us to do well on that exam.

3) Is anything so out of balance that it is beginning to harm my health, relationships, or walk with God? Yeah, here's where it got me. Allow me to go ahead and insert some personal conviction and application. If I were to ask myself if any three (or even all 3) of those areas in my life were being seriously affected by my present "imbalance," what would my answer be? As I'm sitting in my bed with half a voice left from the looooong volleyball tournament I coached, the inability to meet with a friend who needs to talk because I have to work today, and the fact I'm blogging instead of spending some alone time with God, I'm pretty sure it's safe to say I know my answer.

Well, they say knowing is half the battle, right? Now time to readjust and figure out how to get some things in check. Any of you with suggestions, please feel free. Just be nice...please.

Broken

I heard this last Sunday in church, and it completely rocked me. You know when you walk into church, and get that feeling like He's sitting there waiting for you. And not to get all technical, yes I know He's always with me, but what I mean is like He has something a bit special in mind for you in that particular moment. Either way, I walked into worship last Sunday, and literally said to myself, "Oh great, here it comes." Like I knew He was about to push on some buttons and really press into me. Honestly, I haven't been walking with Him very well. Not in the sense of making poor choices, more so in neglecting to spend time with Him and really seeking after Him alone. Lots of stuff distracting me from my relationship with God.

Standing there in church was this overwhelming reminder that He is in fact God...The Holy God that does in fact reign. Worthy and mighty to be praised.

Alleluia Alleluia
For our Lord God Almighty reigns

Alleluia
Holy Holy
Are You Lord God Almighty
Worthy is the Lamb

You are Holy
Holy
Are You Lord God Almighty
Worthy is the Lamb

Amen

Wow

It would be a way big understatement to say it's been awhile. My life's pretty much done a 180 in the last couple months, which has, fortunately or unfortunately, resulted in my inability to update this blog. Pretty sure whatever following I might of had has complete dissipated, but figured I'd update none the less. I haven't even had any sort of harassment from Ashlie! Maybe she even gave up on me! ;0)

So, for the update...I'm now am 110% working all the stinkin time. Most of you know, I'm a personal trainer for 24 Hour, and really loving every minute of it. I seriously work from 5:00am to 8:00pm on a daily basis (minus my Sundays), but am currently trying to create some boundaries so as not to go crazy. I also get to teach cycle a few days a week, as well as some ab/bootcamp classes. Friday's have become light days, and I pretty much just take morning clients. I am definitely poolside for the rest of the day! God has seriously blessed me beyond measure, and my business is pretty ridiculous. I am nothing but grateful for all He has brought into my life. My training staff is pretty great, and we've been blessed with an amazing brand new gym. Love it...

I will admit it's not the easiest environment to be in. It's a world where vanity, self, and success is more than glorified. The more you work, preform, and succeed the greater the respect you gain. I have found myself, more often than I'd like to admit, slipping back into habits and struggles God and I have been walked through before. There is such a tension between success and blessing.

The scripture I've been meditating on for the last week or so...

"Therefore, as you received Christ Jesus the Lord, so walk in him, rooted and built up in him, and established in the faith, just as you were taught, abounding in thanksgiving." Col 2:6-7

and one more...

"...for it is God who works in you, both to will and to work for his good pleasure." Phil 2:13

That I would remember to sink my roots down into Him alone. That I will not be distracted or consumed with the things around me. That I would remember that those things that surround me will fade, and it is Him alone that will remain. Please allow me to overflow with patience, grace, peace, love, and kindness through Your Holy Spirit. Thank you for who I am in YOU.

I will try to do better at keeping what few of you remain updated!!!

MS 150

So, I'm kinda getting into this whole endurance racing/training stuff. I've done the marathon thing, have started swimming, and most recently have taken up outdoor cycling. Most of you know I have taught indoor cycling for some time now. I absolutely love it. One thing I did not love so much was the though of outdoor riding. Um, clipping into a bike going 20+ miles per hour? No thanks. Too stinkin scary. What if I had to stop suddenly? Or I hit a bump and was falling over? NO WAY I want to be clipped in to something!!!

Well, a good friend from college, Ashlie, asked me to think about doing the MS150 with her. What is that you ask? Well, it's a 150+ mile bike ride. Yeah, I said over 150 miles. That's a lot of stinkin miles!!! Long story short, and probably not a huge surprise, I agreed to do it. It was for a great cause (raising money to help end multiple sclerosis), and an awesome challenge. We were to do 86 miles on day one, and the 66 on day two.

We were able to ride through the beautiful countryside of north Texas (basically to Oklahoma). It was awesome just to ride through and take it all in. Well, it was awesome up until the last 10 minutes of the ride. At that point torrential downpour started. It was miserable! We walked around for a solid 2 hours trying to figure out how to leave. You can go to Ashlie's blog to see pics and get a few more details. We were unable to ride day 2 due to the rains, but all in all I gotta admit I wasn't too sad about it. My bum was definitely thankful. It was a great weekend of riding, spending time with Ash and her fam, and getting some quiet time on the road. Thanks for talking me into it Ash!!

The Kashubas

Where to even begin. God has blessed me exceedingly and abundantly more than I could have ever asked or imagined with Amanda and Michal Kashuba. Amanda has become more than a best friend, but an amazing sister in Christ. It's one of those rare friendships I believe few get to experience. I am blessed by her in countless ways, and can honestly say have never taken advantage of the gift she is to me. Amanda, you are irreplaceable, and have been a true Godsend. Thank you from the bottom of my heart!!!

I have the great privilege of being "Aunt" Heather to their 3 precious children. These gifts from above have entered into their home and our lives in a special way. Chad, Brett, and Kaylie became official Kashubas today! It's been a much anticipated day, and one we all never will forget. I have learned so much through both Michael and Amanda, and count it a huge honor to have walked alongside them these last few years in there journey to their new family. It's been a hard, sweet road. One I believe has totally been worth the wait! I only hope one day I have the privilege of adopting my own children. There are so many of God's children that need love, and so many of us able to provide that love.

Lord, that we would remember to pray for and love on your precious children...regardless of circumstance, age, race, or gender. Let us see them through your eyes. And Lord, thank you for the Kashuba family. Thank you for Chaddy, Bretty, and KK. I love them more than I can say, and hold them each close to my heart!

Needing some Jesus

As of late, I've been feeling the lack and desperate need for Jesus in big ways. It's been quite a road the last 9 months or so. I wish I could say I've been full of faith, hope, and trust, BUT the truth of the matter is I've been clinging to the verse "faith as small as a mustard seed" to be more true than ever. No doubt I feel my faith has been tried, tested, and embarassingly small over the last year. BUT in God's ever perfect, unchanging, faithful way, He has proved true in so many ways.

I was talking with a friend the other day about the difficulty in sitting at His feet in the midst of tremendous proof of His faithfulness, and the huge lack of faith on my end. Do you know those moments I'm talking about? You've spent days, weeks, even months questioning and doubting He is who He says He is. You've been frustrated, annoyed, even angry at the "obvious" lack of doing on His part. No matter how many times He has proven His all-knowing, perfect plan I somehow still doubt Him. It's embarassing...really embarassing. I'm having a hard time resting in the loving grace He provides and desires to lavish on me.

How hard it is for my small human mind to comprehend His never ending love and faithful embrace. Oh Lord, that I would have the faith to trust in Your Word and Your forgiveness.

"So let us come boldly to the throne of our gracious God. There we will receive his mercy, and we will find grace to help us when we need it most."
Hebrews 4:16

Get ready to groove

And for the original...Mr Marvin Gaye ladies and gentlemen...

Pslam 51...Enough Said

I read this Psalm the other day, and it convicted me to the core! Kinda one of those hurt-so-good-moments...

Lord, that I would remember it is you alone I am living and breathing for. May I recognize, and not take for granted, the grace you bestow on my life daily, even hourly. Please, let me embrace and not turn away the forgiveness you have bestowed on my life through Your very Son. Thank you. Your love and faithfulness is more than I can comprehend.

"Have mercy on me, O God,
according to your steadfast love;
according to your abundant mercy
blot out my transgressions.
Wash me thoroughly from my iniquity,
and cleanse me from my sin!

For I know my transgressions,
and my sin is ever before me.
Against you, you only, have I sinned
and done what is evil in your sight,
so that you may be justified in your words
and blameless in your judgment.
Behold, I was brought forth in iniquity,
and in sin did my mother conceive me.
Behold, you delight in truth in the inward being,
and you teach me wisdom in the secret heart.

Purge me with hyssop, and I shall be clean;
wash me, and I shall be whiter than snow.
Let me hear joy and gladness;
let the bones that you have broken rejoice.
Hide your face from my sins,
and blot out all my iniquities.
Create in me a clean heart, O God,
and renew a right spirit within me.
Cast me not away from your presence,
and take not your Holy Spirit from me.
Restore to me the joy of your salvation,
and uphold me with a willing spirit.

Then I will teach transgressors your ways,
and sinners will return to you.
Deliver me from blood guiltiness, O God,
O God of my salvation,
and my tongue will sing aloud of your righteousness.
O Lord, open my lips,
and my mouth will declare your praise.
For you will not delight in sacrifice, or I would give it;
you will not be pleased with a burnt offering.
The sacrifices of God are a broken spirit;
a broken and contrite heart, O God, you will not despise."

What if...

My step-dad asked me the other day...

"Heather, what in the world would you do if your computer broke?"

My response...

"Buy a new one."

I think he's tryin to tell me something...

What I'm Rockin

I often have people ask me what I'm listening to, or want my suggestions for new stuff, so I thought I dedicate this blog to the artists I'm currently rockin. Here's a list of a few artist I think are worth your time...

Rosi Golan
Check out the album The Drifter and he Gypsy. My fav tracks are I Don't Want to Wait, Hazy, and Been a Long Day.

Jack Savoretti
Album to start with Between the Minds. Tracks Between the Minds, Dreamers, and No One's Aware. Good stuff

Erin McKeown
She's fun and her sound's catchy. Born to Hum and Slung-lo of her album Grand are awesome.

Michael Warren
I'm obsessed with the track No Way from his album Race to Beat the Sun. Such a great sound. Really like the entire album.

Meaghan Smith
Her voice is intoxicating. She's got this vaudeville jazzy sound mixed with a modern contemporary element. I Know and If You Asked Me, and A Piece for You kinda gives you a rundown on her sound.

St. Lola in the Fields
Creative, emotional sounds. They only have an EP out, but it's good. Don't Say and He's in Love are my top picks.

Erin McCarly
Love Save the Empty and SleepWalking are two songs that get me going. Pitter-Pat is a bit slower, more of the ultimate "break-up" kinda song.

The Alternate Routes
I got to see these guys live...they're fun. They got a kinda rock with a bit of softer folk feel to them. Try out The Future's Nothing New and Asked You Twice.

Leona Naess
She's a bit funkier. Her album's title track I Tried to Rock You But You Only Roll goes with me on lots of runs.

Schyler Fisk
I just started listening to her. Haven't had time to listen to a lot of her stuff. I do like Hello and Fall Apart Today. Singer/songwriter genre, but more on the pop side of that.


Alright, would be interested to hear what you thought. And would love to hear YOUR suggestions! I'm definitely a person that would be lost without music, so I'm always up for something new.

Finally...

I've been meaning to update this for a LONG while, but just seem to always find other things to do...after some gentle nudging, some not so nice facebook comments, Ash ;0) , and the stomach flu, I figured it was a good time to go ahead and do that.

So, enjoy the updates below, and there will be a couple more to come...soon hopefully ;0)

A Child of the Great I Am

I came across one of my old newsletters, and this one in particular really jumped out at me. I wrote this almost a year ago...which made me sad. Sad because it took little introspection to realize I'm still living in that sad shadow of a slave. I pray it would cause you to take a second and ask yourself," Am I living as the child He intended, or the slave?"

Tim Keller has done a great study on the book of Galatians. Each week my team and I read through the study through winces and cringing. It tends to cut straight to the heart of the matter, bypassing the pleasantries and getting right at it…just hurts so good. Before I begin each week, I take a deep breath and pray God’s grace to grow and be challenged. All that to say, it’s good stuff…

So, a couple of weeks ago brought us to Galatians 5:1-15. Paul is re-introducing the truths of our freedom found in Christ. He’s confronting the problems coming from those misusing that freedom. That understanding our freedom; the gift of Christ on the Cross, and the love He poured on us, that is what propels us to obey. This lead us to ask ourselves the question, “Am I living as a Son of slave?” So, take a deep breath, and meditate on the differences. Are you living as a Son or as a slave? (Here we go…)

Slave: Compulsive obedience. Obeys God and moral codes out of fear of rejection- a compulsive, driven moralism.
Child: Obeys out of joy in your Father and out of gratitude for the certainty of his love.
Slave: Hiding. Lots of strategies to hide our inner and outer failings from one another and ourselves. Lots of gossip, blame shifting, defensiveness…
Child: Open and transparent. Freedom from having to put up a front. Able to appreciate people who are different and hurting.
Slave: Isolation. Feeling that no one understands, that no one cares. An unwillingness to trust or intense, idolatrous trust of someone who inevitably disappoints.
Child: Because of openness and transparency and a lack of self-absorbed self-pity, a growing circle of friends with whom you are neither too independent nor over dependent.
Slave: Controlled by people’s opinion. Expectations and approval of others become the real moral standard
Child: Integrity and courage regardless of who is watching. “The only person whose opinion counts is my Father’s!”

Trust

“Pray that I would have clarity,” he said. Mother Teresa replied firmly, “No, I will not do that. Clarity is the last thing you are clinging to and must let go of.” When the young man commented that she always seemed to have the clarity he longed for, she laughed. “I have never had clarity; what I have always had is trust. So I will pray that you trust God.”

What I often pray for others and myself is that we will have clarity. That God will give us discernment and wisdom. What I’m realizing more and more is that although these things can be good, what we really should be craving is trust in Him. What I should be praying for others and myself is for God to grant us the ability to trust. Trust is a hard thing. It takes an enormous amount of courage to say with complete truth, “I trust in You. Wherever you lead, I will follow.” Knowledge is so much more comforting than blindly walking. Unfortunately clarity is fleeting, and rarely cultivates lasting trust. It really just temporarily alleviates uncertainty.

As always, I believe this comes back to love. If we cannot say from the depths of our souls that we are cherished and loved by the One and Only, then trust is really just a lofty notion. How can we trust all that we are and will be to someone we don’t believe loves us? If I know God’s love for me is never-ending (Eph 3:17-18), that He will always fight for me (Ex 14:13-14), and His protection never ends (Ps 121:8), then how can I not trust Him? If trusting Him is as hard for you as it is for me, may we revisit daily, hourly if necessary, the depths of His love for us. I long to trust Him completely.

Some Favs

A friend and I were walking down memory lane, discussing some of our favorite things of the past. It got us reflecting on some of our favorite things, which resulted in this post. I wanted to do top ten's, but decided to do top five instead. Not quite the same ring, but it'll work...Let me know some of YOUR favorite things!

Top 5 Cartoons from my childhood:
5. Gummy Bears : Who didn't want some gummy bearry juice?
4. Garfield : Jon Arbuckle and Odie. Enough said.
3. Alvin and the Chipmunks
2. Pee-Wee's Playhouse : Ms Chairry, the ant farm, Penny...classic
1. Smurfs

Top 5 shows that impacted my world:
5. Saved By the Bell
4. Charles In Charge
3. Felicity
2. ER (early days)
1. Bevery Hills 90210

Foods I couldn't do without:
5. Salad
4. Wedding Cake
3. Chips and Salsa
2. Peanut Butter
1. Cereal

Top 5 Places I've traveled:
5. Venice, Italy
4. Recife, Brazil
3. Istanbul, Turkey
2. Salzburg, Austria
1. Prague, Czech Republic

Top 5 movies:
5. Pretty Women
4. Beaches
3. Dumb and Dumber
2. Last of the Mohicans
1. Pride and Prejudice

Top 5 fun memories:
5. Beginning of senior year in high school
4. Countless memories at Frontier with the wonderful Fronterns
3. Concerts with Lace
2. Freshmen year of college
1. My 25th Birthday


We're goin 10 on this one...
Top 10 songs to break it down to. Now, small disclaimer: Some of us may not want to admit it, but we all know that when we hear them, they definitely make us want to break it down. So, here they are:
10."Hot In Herre" - Nelly
9. "The Way You Move" - Outkast
8. "Vivrant Thing" - Q Tip
7. "Bootylicious" - Destiny's Child
6. "Hypnotize" - Biggie
5. "Gold Digger" - Kanye
4. "In Da Clube"- 50
3. "Gotta Give It Up" - Marvin Gaye
2. "Yeah" - Usher
1. "Livin La Vida Loca" - Ricky Martin SIKE!
1. "Gettin Jiggy Wit It" - Will Smith

I Need Africa...

More than Africa needs me...

I have had the privilege of partnering with a great organization called Mocha Club for a little while now. I first got to know this organization through a couple artist I love; Matt Wertz and Dave Barnes. Their thinking is that if you save the money you would spend on a couple of mochas ($7) a month, and use it to help people in Africa it can do one of the following things:

~feed a person for a month
~save one person's life from malaria
~educate 2 children one full school term
~provide clean water for 7 Africans for one year

I don't drink mochas, or coffee for that matter, BUT I can spare at least $7 a month. Can you? If so, go to www.MochaClub.org for info.

Below is a great video on why we need Africa more than Africa needs us....

"My new reality...My joy should have no regard for my circumstances."

What's In A Name...

The name Heather is of Middle English origin...an evergreen flowering plant that thrives on peaty barren lands. Has an upper-class aura. A variety of small shrubs with pink or white flowers which commonly grow in rocky areas.

Have you ever really looked into the meaning of your name? I have really only read the quick description given in random baby name books, and that usually say "flowering herb." I know, be jealous. I never really thought much about it. I decided to breakdown some of the words in the description.

"Evergreen" - Having foliage that persists and remains green throughout the year. Perenially fresh or interesting; enduring.

Not only remains green through different seasons, but actually "thrives on peaty barren lands"...

"Barren" - Incapable of producing, not producing, lacking

Doesn't that seem like a bit of an oxymoron? Thriving on barren lands? Sounds nice, but a bit ironic. Barren is incapable of producing, and yet the heather plant thrives in those exact conditions. It's the "peaty" part of the lands that make the thriving possible. As much as peat is good for growth, it's equally as dangerous.

And I'm sure it's more of a coincidence in timing, but I can't help but "feel" the similarities of the above description and my current state in life. Although, I'm not really feeling the whole "thriving" part as of late (as of late meaning the last 9 months) I definitely feel the peaty, barren lands. It's a fine balance of good and bad...life-giving and life-ending.

Maybe I'm in the wrong barren land...not enough "peat." I haven't really been having the "fresh green feeling" the last year...

BUT then again, maybe I'm just reading to much into it. You can also find Heather defined as "a shrub." Maybe I'll just go with that one.

2008

I think this might have been my favorite New Years ever. Yes, I had great company. Yes, I was surrounded by the beautiful mountains of Colorado. Most importantly, what made this year the best ever was the fact I got to spend New Year's day skiing...all day. I didn't really take the time to look back and reflect until I got on the bus and headed home. I made sure to soak up as much of my surroundings as possible. I didn't want to waste a moment looking back, when my present was so perfect.

But now I'm ready to look back and ponder on 2008...It's ups and downs, joys and sadness, firsts and lasts...I've decided to go month by month, briefly highlighting the important (or not so important) happenings.

January: Hungary. AIA Conference.

February: 27. Roadtrip. Katie. Vienna. Salzburg. Liechtenstein. Zurich. Munich.

March: Poland. Auschwitz. Intense.

April: Uneventful.

May: Praha Goodbyes. Marathon training begin...

June: Philly hellos. World Harvest newest member. Katie's married!

July: QT with the fam. Texas Peach Festival

August: Still running...

September: Ran the half. Became "Miss Heather" to some cutie 4 year olds.

October: Roadtrip with fam to Tennessee. Biggest black eye ever.

November: Saw the beautiful CA-Nada. Jax and Michael! Become "Coach Heather."

December: Ran a marathon. And ended the year in the beautiful state of Colorado.


What a year! It was one of the most challenging, interesting, and blessed years of my life. I'm thankful the Lord has graced me with another year to grow and be refined into His image. I'm thankful for the people He has in my life at this exact moment in time. Here's to 2008, and to the great moments to come in 2009!